说没关系，说我不在乎，说无所谓，那些都是写给自己的一堆谎言。我在乎。你说的话我多在乎，我都在聆听，我都记住。也便便因为这样，我受伤。过了，you've crossed the line. it's beyond my comfort zone. 我不能不说，不能不回答。不是不想说，不是不想回答。只是不舒服。i'm uncomfortable and upset that it concerns you that much, that it matter to you that much. something that i wished you wouldn't be too concerned about. 我以为你不一样。其实你和别人都一样，都在乎。

从前从前有个人爱你很久。但偏偏雨渐渐把距离吹得好远。

我们之间的距离是你自己造成的。我知道，你希望我们之间的距离能拉进一些，你希望我不会在我们之间画清界限。我知道你希望我能在告诉你这一切的时候发现其实我们之间的距离没那么遥远。可是你这么做似乎只把我推得更远。我们原来那么不一样，我们在乎的原来那么不一样。未来的日子里我能这样过着吗？

it didnt turn out like expected. well, life is full of surprises i guess. i should be greatful for that conversation i guess. because i came to realize that you dont seem to be the one im looking for. 我以为自己会答应，i'll have to think twice. can i live with this? can i live with this sadness/upset/hitting my self-confidence/threatning it. i can't. i don't want to.

雨渐渐把距离吹得好远好远。